Of course I wish it were you. Instead, I’ve got this guy.

We will join 72 other travelers on a tricked out 757 where National Geographic has replaced the normal 215 seats with 77 ‘deluxe’ ones.

We received a passenger manifest, of whom I know zero, but close to 30% of them are from California. My spouse is a nosy-parker, so he did some internet creeping (which in his case amounts to a lot of “Linked-in”) and sleuthed that (SURPRISE) most of these folks are educated, old, and have some dough.

I’m sure many of them chose this trip for the same reason we did, fear that WE WON’T LIVE LONG ENOUGH TO SEE ALL THE THINGS. By eliminating the connections and layovers and other crappy parts of travel, we will spend an optimal number of minutes climbing the Picchu and snorkeling the Barrier before we are dead. We are essentially buying time (BTW time is not cheap).

Along for the ride are experts from National Geographic; a paleoanthropologist (not just any paleoanthropologist, but Donald Johanson), a cultural historian, a documentary photographer, a chief science and exploration officer, a few guides, a doctor…

…and of course, this guy